January 6, 2013

• Moral Support

  On December 28, I received an email from one of my girls. 

  We're usually on email or WeChat on a daily basis. We haven't heard from her in days. We just assumed she was busy with her boyfriend, visiting her in NYC.

  The email was short, it said: "Brain surgery at NYU tonight. Have a big ass cyst. Ask JC (boyfriend) for questions."

  It came out of no where. We were all in shock. From diagnosis to surgery, it was a mere 16 hours.

  It ended up being a 7cm brain tumor, not a cyst. Size of an egg. The surgery was smooth and she's recovering well. 

  But a brain tumor at 30? It was surreal. 

  When I first received the email, I didn't quite understand the implications. 

  So I emailed my best friend in Singapore who's a doctor and asked, "How bad is this?" 

  When my best friend responded, I teared. It was then that I realized it could be serious.

  

  We're all anxiously waiting for pathology results now. The tumor could be benign or cancerous. I don't know why, I really think it's benign. 

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  My company recently went through a round of layoff. I was chatting with a colleague who got the pink slip. She told me, "Sometimes people don't say anything because they don't know what to say. But, that's even weirder."

  When she received emails telling her she'd be missed, the support lifted her from the state of rejection.

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  A good friend's mom passed away last year. I learned how important it is to offer a hand of support. You may not know what to say, but, even a "Are you ok?" or a "Can I help with anything?" means something.

  Being there is important.

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  When I got kicked out of PUYO, I remember what the streams of emails and checkups did for me. They were my source of strength. Simple words, but they went a long way to get me out of my pit.

  -----

  As I'm thinking about these four different scenarios. I see a commonality.

  Practical or not, showing that you care is important.

  You may not know what to say, but, if the person's close to you, say something.

  Showing that you're by their side means something, especially when they are in a state of vulnerability.

  • 2:28 am
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